|
Leid-Back Luau Larry –
The Haole from Hawaii!
Maika'i Mentality and
Mai Tais Make Him The Wizard of Waikiki
In his element:
Waikiki with a "Luau Larry Special" (extra rum) on a booze
cruise.
Aloha nui loa. A Hui Ho. Okole Maluna.
These cheerful Hawaiian phrases flow off his lips as easily as the
rum flows down his throat.
Meet Luau Larry, the forever-blonde, forever-tanned beach character
we wish we could all be, the haole from Hawaii who has thrived without
the parameters of ordinary society that paralyze the fun of so many
others.
Luau Larry does not have a cell phone. He does not wear a watch. It
took him until 2004 to even get a computer. Ask him how long he was
at a particular place on a given day or night and instead of giving
a general time, like "around 10," he'll say, "I was there
until I wasn't there."
He has had exactly two occupations in his lifetime – selling suntan
lotion to tourists and flight attendant for an airline that flies primarily
in and out of Hawaii and requires him to work an exhausting 8-10 days
a month.
His "office" is a mai tai bar. On Waikiki Beach.
Whomever coined the phrase, "Life's a Beach" must have first
met Luau Larry.
 While
he has been to beaches all over the world –
Australia, Fiji and he even lived in the Greek
Islands for a while – it is in Waikiki that he
is in his truest element. He belongs there, like a seashell on
the seashore. Walking Waikiki with Luau Larry is a process as slow moving
as the winter swells; he stops to say "Aloha" – or more
precicesly "Aloha nui loa," which is an extra-special greeting
– to old friends all up and down the sand. Then he settles into
his "office" for an afternoon of mai tais. After a couple
of rounds, with the aqua-blue water in the foreground and Diamond Head
in the background, others may feel that urge to "drink and dial"
friends who are stuck somewhere else,. But not Luau Larry. "If
they are not here, it doesn't matter,."he says. And then he has
another sip of his mai tai.
Waikiki is where he is most natural, much as great achievers are where
they shine the brightest – Barry Bonds in a batter's box, Jimmy
Buffett
on stage at an amphitheater, The Pope at his pulpit. Except for one
difference – they are working and Luau Larry is lounging.
|
Luau
Larry's Sun Tanning Tips
Having run a sun tanning booth on Waikiki
Beach makes Luau Larry an expert. Here are his tips on getting
a suntan and avoiding a sunburn.
• Hawaii is just 23 degrees north of the equator. Therefore,
it's much easier to burn here than at home; be careful.
• Places where the skin is closest to the bone burn most
easily. That is, the forehead, nose, shoulders, hands and feet.
Use the highest protection factor on these areas.
• Check the ingredients before buying lotion. Try and use
products whose first ingredient is lotion, not water.
• Avoid mineral and baby oils. They are not absorbed into
the skin and will cause blisters. Instead, use vegetable, sesame
or mink oils.
• The only way to avoid a sunburn is to get
a suntan. Tanning is not a race, it's a marathon. Don't
try and do it all in one day.
|
Some people happen to be married to spouses or to their job. Luau Larry
is married to the tropics. Is it surprising then, that his favorite
drinks contain rum?
Of Danish heritage and transplanted from Milwaukee – hey, you
would if you could – he arrived in the Aloha State to play baseball
for the University of Hawaii. After successfully convincing the administration
he was worthy of society by earning a degree – we have no idea
in what field – and hosting many a party from his apartment high
above Honolulu, he embarked on a career of, well, the beach.
His first job out of college was selling suntan lotion at the Waikiki
Hilton. This is something he kept doing for, oh, 5-6 years.
"I began my days at the beach and I ended them at the beach,"
he says.
But his nights were only beginning. His roommate was a bartender –
think about that for a minute – so he would invite thirsty wahines
to join him for a few after he folded up the umbrellas. Once, he went
out for 28 consecutive nights.
One of his "jobs" at the beach was to educate visitors on
proper suntanning techniques in the intense Hawaiian sun. Single girls
on holiday received special attention. After a hot day, he offered them
a sample of the premium lotion, which he cleverly kept chilled in an
ice bucket. As he applied the cold, soothing solution to their warm
skin, he would announce, "Today we are running a special. This
lotion comes with a free applicator. And you're looking at him!"
Ahh, but those days are over his shoulder. Now he's jetting across
the Pacific with passengers bound for paradise. Although he's based
in
Los Angeles, he's in Hawaii more often than the trade
winds.
So if you happen to find yourself in Waikiki and want to meet up with
Luau Larry, feel free to do so.
But don't bother to call. He'll be in his office.
Drinking rum with
PubClub's Bartender, at Jimmy
Buffett in Waikiki.
Read
About the Mai Tai Bar, other Honolulu bars and hangouts and learn Luau
Larry's Hawaii Suntanning Tips
|