The Inspiration Of A Frosted Plastic Cup Leads To The Blogger Getting Laid
Every now and then, I write about sexual escapades.
Some of them are stories from friends and some of them involve myself. This is one of the latter. And I call it The Tale Of The Frozen Margarita Trick.
It involves a girl named Lynn, whom I met through a friend on a Jimmy Buffett party bus. That alone, for anyone who has ever been on a Jimmy Buffett party bus, should set the stage.
And it ended in ecstasy – mutual ecstasy, I must point out – but the real story is about the lengths guys will go to in order to try to get laid.
Ironically, it didn’t happen after the bus – or even on the bus, tho I have had that experience at a Buffett show – but a week or so later. Lynn had me so worked up on the bus – she told me, and I quote, “I don’t have big breasts but I do have a great ass” – that I just HAD to see her again.
So I invited her over for margaritas. I live at the beach and margaritas are part of the culture. The margaritas I make are frozen and are from a special recipe taught to me by a former roommate. They are delicious and are also quiet potent.
Lynn showed up like many girls dress here, and that is to say not wearing many clothes. After a few margaritas, I invited her up to my room and she quickly accepted.
Because sex was not a certainty and I figured the more alcohol I had with me, the better my chances were of getting laid, I took two large plastic cups – the kind you get at sporting events, not the red cup ones – and filled them with the frozen margaritas.
Now let me say at this point, we were both pretty buzzed. And once we got upstairs, we immediately started fooling around. Lynn was right; she didn’t have much in the chest area but she sure had a fantastic ass.
It took minimal effort to get her stripped down to her g-string, but once there – right on the teetering edge of success – she stopped me cold. Nothing I said, did, or whatever move I tried, would make her change her mind.
Frustrated, I sat up to get a drink. The cups were on the nightstand, and by this time were frosted on the outside. Lynn was laying on her stomach, legs spread out with that sexy g-string and great ass right there, but not for the taking.
Well, I was just buzzed enough – and tequila is better for this than any other type of alcohol – to come up with some creative thinking. I looked at the frost on the cups, then at her rear, and got an idea. I took one of the cups and placed it right against her private parts and rotated it around and around.
Well she jumped up as if she had been shocked. He flipped around and, in one magical move, flipped off her panties, grabbed my by the neck and pulled me toward her.
“I bet you do this to all the girls,” she said with deep passion. Before I could even say to myself that I had never thought of it before or even considered it an option, she panted, “oh, I don’t care. Just make love to me.”
We then went after it like animals on the Discovery Channel.
So when I’m around girls at home, I always make them frozen margaritas!