If You’re Going To Drink, Drink Often!

Watch out partying veterans, there’s a lot of imitators out on New Year’s Eve.
The one-night wonders. Drinking amateurs. Squids.
This is the night when those who don’t drink the rest of the year suddenly toss ’em back as if they are at a Jimmy Buffett concert. Try and keep pace with the veterans. Be the big man on campus.

Well, I’m here to tell you to watch out for them. They don’t know how to handle their alcohol and are likely to stumble or ram into you in a crowded area, lose control, hit on your wife/girlfriend with no idea what the are actually saying, suddenly start telling you their life’s story while you are trying to hit on that hot blonde who’s been hanging out in the kitchen of the party, and take up way too much time in the bathroom when you really need to use it.
Why? Because it’s New Year’s Eve!
I’ve seen this time and time again, and it’s always ugly.
If you’re in a big public party – like the Las Vegas Strip – then you can just try and sidestep them and move someplace else. (For some reason, they keep on being able to find me and I have to keep moving. But eventually they disappear). If you’re in a more intimate place, like a small house party, then they are harder to avoid. They always turn up by the keg or booze spot, unable to handle anymore but really unsure of what to do, because they are only in this situation once a year.
That’s why I always say, and live by this rule, “If you’re going to drink, drink often!”
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