Clemson-Texas A&M, LSU-Texas & What’s Happening At Tennessee And In The SEC
There’s smoke coming out of the top of ‘ol Smokey and it’s not another boat on fire in the Volunteer Navy.
It’s actually steam coming out of the ears of Tennessee football fans, who suddenly find themselves saying “not again” yet again. The words “Georgia State” are the modern-day equivalent of what “North Texas” was for Vols fans in the 1970s. The biggest question now for Jeremy Pruitt is – like happened in the 70s with then-coach Bill Battle – will someone send a moving fan to the coach’s house?
But as bad as that loss was for UT and the SEC, South Carolina’s wimpy showing against North Carolina was actually worse. At least Pruitt can claim he’s trying to build a program. Will “He Ever Be A Good Head Coach” Muschamp is in his fourth year and his Not-So Game-Cocks are quickly turning into the Calamity of Columbia.
But neither program is being run (into the ground?) by the Blazing Saddles coach that is down at Florida State – “Taggert!”
Over in the Lack-12, Hot Seat Helton and Chip On His Shoulder Kelley are giving Trojans and Baby Bears fans little reason to leave the beach to go to the Coliseum and Rose Bowl, respectively. Up in the land of the original craft beer, Not-So-Super Mario Cristobol must learn that if he’s ever going to build an SEC program on the West Coast, he must coach like an SEC coach and play to win rather than not to lose.
Meanwhile, the macho machines of Clemson, Alabama, Georgia, Ohio State and Oklahoma are rolling, oblivious to the train wrecks happening beneath them.
Oh, it’s so good to be at the top. And not on Rocky Top.
Onto this week’s games. All times Pacific because The Prognosticator lives on the West Coast
Cincinnati at Ohio State (9 a.m., ABC)
The Nuts had a Fields Day against the Twitter Troller last week and now turn to their glare to an in-state team. For all the talk coming out of Norman, the best transfer QB may be residing in Columbus and the visitors are about to witness that he arrived there Justin time. Luke is not too Fickle in leading the Bearcats into here, even tho it will be a bear (cats) trap. They will put up more of a fight than the Kiffins were able to muster but won’t be able to crack this nut. Winner: Ohio State
Texas A&M at Clemson (12:30 p.m., ABC)
After having the Tigers clinging to a life raft last year in College Station, only to be bailed about by a quarterback that Dabo later sent out to sea, the Cadets march into the ACC’s Death Valley wondering if they can repeat the feat. They will encounter a bunch of extra-feisty Felines who are now poised to pounce on anything associated with the SEC. They can’t bring the 12th Man with them, either, and while they will show up with their muskets loaded, the inhospitable hosts will chew them up in the end. Winner: Clemson
New Mexico State at Alabama (1 p.m., SEC Network)
Even with all their greatness and championships, there are two puzzling pieces to the Pachyderms under Coach Saban: finding a field goal kicker and struggling in week two after a resounding opening game. This means it may take about a quarter for the Red Elephants to start stomping the Sacrificial Lambs, who suffered a 57-8 defeat last week to Washington State. Bama fans are not being quick to embrace the play calling capabilities of Coach Cutty Sark, who would prefer he throw the ball down the field rather than run all those Kiffin-esque short tosses. Eventually, Bama is going to have to bully its opponents and beat them deep, but for now when the Tide gets rolling in this one, they won’t be stopped unless the officials enact softball’s mercy rule. Winner: Alabama
San Diego State at UCLA (1:15 p.m., Pac-12 Network)
The Sunny San Diegans head north where things aren’t too rosy for either team. The visitors scored but six points last week and looked like the Keystone Cops on a third field goal attempt. The hosts are licking their substantial wounds from last week’s road trip that made it look as if the team was in hibernation the entire off-season. Winner: UCLA
BYU at Tennessee (4 p.m., ESPN)
The Rocky Vols are hoping to prove that last week was a fluke, tho they proved to be out of shape, out of place on defense and out of excuses one game into the season. The Mountain Lions aren’t exactly beasts themselves, but they should tear through the Tennessee D with their runners the way their quarterbacks used to do to opponents’ DBs. Warm up the moving van, UT folks. Pruitt’s address is…. Winner: BYU
LSU at Texas (4:30 p.m., ABC)
The creole-loving Cajuns ramble into the land of Bevo looking to bring a little Louisiana home cooking to the hosts with a new gumbo offense that has a little bit of everything in it. Or at least that’s the idea; when things get going the Coach O’s may fall back to what they know best, which is to run the ball in the middle and rely on their defensive athletes to make a play. The Steers feel they are “baaack” this year but need to hold “baaack” on those thoughts until they prove it on the field. This won’t do it, for the Cajuns are going to get just crazy enough to dish out a defeat to their hosts. Winner: LSU
Stanford at USC (7:30 p.m., ESPN)
The best things to happen to Hot Seat Helton was to have his quarterback get injured for the year. Now he can claim that whatever happens this year was a result of it. And considering he allowed Helton to stay on after last year, Athletic Lynn Swann may just buy it. The Former Indians may be without their quarterback, too, and in this battle of the Cardinal and the cardinal and gold, it’s going to be the men of Troy seeing the most red. Winner: Stanford
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