The NIL, so many transfers we may start having to buy programs again to keep track of all the new players and USC and UCLA trading culture for cash. It’s enough to make you say “enough of this; just play the damned games!”
College football’s offseason has had more drama than the George Steinbrenner Yankees. You certainly can’t tell the conferences from the teams in it. And you thought you knew your Big 10 from your Pac-12.
Those trying to predict what teams will finish where are guessing like they are trying to figure out magic tricks. Beyond Alabama and Georgia, what do we know about the other teams? Michigan proved it was in a class below Georgia and Ohio State lost to Big Blue so what does that say about the Flower Buds?
Texas A&M still doesn’t have a quarterback and is in a Jimbo limbo of 8-4 seasons. USC has wisely ditched Clueless Clay yet it is unrealistic to expect a one-season turnaround with Lincoln’s rebuilding logs even tho it plays (for now) in quite possibility the weakest conference in football. Clemson may be “back” but then again with that quarterback it may not. Notre Dame is back to being the Fighting Irish in one area: an over-inflated ranking.
But that’s why they play the games.
Meanwhile, in the land of Lincoln, Nebraska, things are not frosty but red hot under the pants of Scott “Onside Kick” Frost. Seriously, is he trying to get fired? Or maybe he snuck off the concession stand at halftime for some of that free beer. That’s right, there was free beer. The venue is a cashless stadium and the Internet went down so keep that in mind when you go to a game in a place that relies only on credit and debit cards.
Onto this week’s major matchups. All times Pacific because the Prognosticator lives in San Diego.
• Saturday, Sept. 3
Oregon at Georgia (12:30 ABC)
How’s this for a story line – a former assistant coach faces the team he helped win a National Championship. The timing of his exit is good, for the Junkyard Dawgs will be a little less ferocious this year after losing to many players to the NFL. And while he may turn out to be the next coming of Mike Bellottti (or perhaps the next John Warren), and while the Kirby Canines are hardly an offensive juggernaut, the Ducks must first overcome the recent past and that is the Cristol-ball’s inability to finish games. Winner: Georgia
Cincinnati at Arkansas (12:30 ESPN)
The Cinci Cats beared down last year to make the College Football Playoffs but the real measure of whether a program is successful are not (are you paying attention former LSU headmaster Coach O?) is can it sustain it on a consistent basis. It’s too much to ask, especially opening against a team on the rise which has gone hog wild over its coach. Winner: Arkansas
Arizona at San Diego State (12:30 p.m. CBS)
If you want a few early laughs to start your college football season the Zonies have been one of the worst teams in college football the past three years. Winner: San Diego State.
Rice at USC (3:30 p.m., Pac-12 Network)
The Lincoln Tunnel is open but will Troy is able to conquer it this season is more of a question than whether or not it will boil Rice. Traveler will be making so many trips around the Coliseum field that he will need to spend time as much time in the oxygen tent as he does the end zone. Winner: USC
Notre Dame at Ohio State (4:30 p.m., ABC)
The Domers enter a new era with Marcus Freeman on the headsets hopeful to go back to an old era when the team was a legitimate annual National Championship contender. Lately, they have been pretenders. They walk into the Horseshoe in the biggest college football game on Labor Day Weekend and by the time it’s done, the “i” will not be the only thing that’s dotted at Ohio State. Winner: Ohio State
Utah State at Alabama (4:30 p.m., SEC Network)
The proud Pachyderms head into the season opener with the realistic expectation of winning it all. After a rebuilding year in which they likely came within a dropped pass of winning the National Championship, they are ready to roll over any hapless team that stands in the way of this tidal wave. These Aggies are hardly the same as the ones from Texas that will visit Bryant-Denny later this season and will quickly discover it’s more about survival than victory. Winner: Alabama
• Sunday Sept. 4
Florida State at LSU (4:30 p.m., ESPN)
The Spears speared their first opponent in Week O but that’s hardly the same things as traveling to Death Valley for a night game. Especially with those crazy Cajuns hungry to see if fake accent Cajun Kelly can bring some spice to the program. Picking this game is admittedly as difficult as figuring out which restaurant to get a bowl of gumbo at in New Orleans, but whenever in doubt, go with the home crowd. Especially in the Red Baton. Winner: LSU
• Monday Sept. 5
Clemson at Georgia Tech (5 p.m., ESPN), This is a game in which only Clemson fans will have to worry about staying up too late before returning to work and reality on Tuesday morning. With games like this on the schedule, the Dabos will be on schedule to return to the College Football Playoffs. Winner: Clemson
Leave a Reply