LSU To Be Hit By A Hottie Toddie Hurricane
There’s an in-state rivalry, a cross-state rivalry and the state of several teams on the line as college football enters Week 12.
The Pigskin Prognosticator makes picks and predictions from the Midwest to the plains of Utah to Plains of the South and the mountains of the Pacific Northwest. As the College Football Playoffs committee proves, it can be an inexact science, a world in which number ones can bounce around like ping pong balls and a loss to South Carolina is apparently worth more than one to LSU.
All times Pacific because the Pigskin Prognosticator lives on the West Coast.
Now onto this week’s games.
Alabama at Mississippi State (9 a.m., ESPN)
Things have been pretty stark in Starkville this fall and even a wounded Pachyderm presents a major problem for the State Dogs. The Tua Tsumanami may not materialize for the Bama boys, who might turn to Matt to get their Jones juice flowing for this one, but that won’t stop the Tide from rolling. Winner: Alabama
Wisconsin at Nebraska (9 a.m., Big 10 Network)
The frost will barely be off the cornfields when they kick off this game yet it’s the Frost in the stadium that’s the real concern in Lincoln. The Shuckers have not only been unable to shuck off their modern mediocrity, they are having the leanest fall harvest in decades. The ever-patient fans like to believe they are planting the seeds for success but Bucky Badger will be the next in line to trample the crops. Winner: Wisconsin
Michigan State at Michigan (9 a.m., FOX)
From feeling blue to “Go Blue,” fans are starting to possibly believe the tales of a revival under Coach Khaki are perhaps more reality than myth. State rival State would like to keep that from being more fiction than fact, but the Warriors has been busy fighting off rumors of the demise of thier own coach. Into this scene steps one of college football’s great rivalries tho with the lack of spark in Sparty’s offense, this one will lack the drama of the classics. Winner: Michigan
Ohio State at Rutgers (12:30 p.m., Big 10 Network)
A landslide is rolling toward Jersey and if you think the snowfall is bad wait until the Scarlets are hit with a wave of nuts from Ohio. This is going to be a blizzard of a different kind, one that will inundate the helpless hosts in a barrage of points that may require adding another number to the visiting team’s side on the scoreboard. Winner: Ohio State
Wake Forest at Clemson (12:30 p.m., ABC)
For the first part of the season, it appeared as if the Deamons’ ship might have come in, but it has run aground twice and now heads to the tiny port of Clemson, where it threatens to get swamped. Tigers are usually better on land but they are going to be boarding their speedboats on Saturday and will be leaving the Deacons in their wake. Winner: Clemson
Georgia at Auburn (12:30 p.m., CBS)
The Kirby Canines have no bone to pick with the playoff committee but know they are on a short leash. They are doogoned determined to stay on that trail when they go on the road for the South’s oldest rivalry. For the host Birds, the Prayer at Jordan-Hare will not be for a miracle pass but that the Gus Busers will be able to actually score a couple of touchdowns. Winner: Georgia
Minnesota at Iowa (1 p.m., FOX)
The Caddyshack Creatures are dancing in their gopher hole and now head to the Land of the Big 10 Upsets to see if they can keep feeling alright. Midway through the fourth quarter they may be singing why you got to gimme a fight? Can’t you just let it be?, as the flightless Birds make it par for the course for another undefeated team coming into Kinnick Stadium. Winner: Iowa
Incarnate Word at New Mexico State (No TV)
Just seeing if you’re paying attention! Winner: Incarnate World
LSU at Ole Miss (4 p.m., ESPN)
The Cajuns are partying but they had better put down their Hand Grenades and Hurricanes long enough to realize they are facing a potential storm in Oxford. The Felines have a tendency to trip after a celebration like a Mardi Gras rookie on Bourbon Street. Those hangovers hurt. The Hottie Toddy is the drink on this night as The Prognosticator is going with history here by predicting a major upset. Winner: Ole Miss
Oklahoma at Baylor (4: 30 p.m., ABC)
The Bears have been clawing their way around the conference with a dominant D, but facing Oklahoma is no walk through the woods. The Jalen Jackrabbits are a tough animal to catch and the hosts could be walking into a bear trap. If they can rise up enough and force Hurts into his “bail out and roll right” habit that characterized much of his passing time at Alabama, they have a good chance to make some noise with the committee. Winner: Oklahoma
South Carolina at Texas A&M (4:30 p.m., SEC Network)
The munchkin Muschamps have been unable to duplicate their surprise in Sanford and the Chickens now go for the kill in Kyle Field. They had better bring some extra cockiness with them from Columbia, for the 12th Men are ready to march into a respectable bowl game. With Georgia and LSU looming for the Cadets, the Gamecocks are right in the home team’s firing line. Winner: Texas A&M
UCLA at Utah (5 p.m., FOX)
After slumbering through the first part of the season, the Baby Bears have awoken somewhat of late to at least cause a few fans to quit hitting the snooze button on their alarms. One can never be sure what to expect from the Trampolines, but they traditionally get up for the bigger road games. They might here, too. Then again, the Utes mean business and will likely put the visitors to sleep early in this one. Winner: Utah
Arizona at Oregon (7:30 p.m., ESPN)
There’s a potential Duck Dynasty building in the Pac-12 and one thing that will not be standing in their way is a bunch of less-than-wild Cats. The Zonies are zoned out under the smug Sumlin, whose idea of defense is to have his players stand around and look at each other saying “I thought you had him.” The Waddlers will take full advantage and have this one sealed up by halftime. Winner: Oregon
USC at Cal (8 p.m.., FS1)
Troy makes the trek to Berkeley where the Beatniks look to put a beating on the battered boys from SoCal. The Hot Seat Heltons have adopted their cross-town rivals’ trampoline act of bouncing up and down from one week to the next while their hosts have simply fell to the mat and stayed there. Winner: USC
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kevinwilkerson says
Ahh, in agreement with the big upset! Never heard of LSU referred to as the Corndogs. Love it! — The Pigskin Prognosticator
Cary says
Corndogs go down’
HOTTY TODDY!
😘😂😂